Picture: RibeiroPhoto

This Valentine’s Day, we asked you on our Instagram story if you train with your significant other. Out of almost 150 votes, the answer was: 77% YES while 23% said NO. Let’s dive right into it the “why” and “how” behind these answers!*

“People don’t even know we’re a couple.” – J

Maybe it’s because we live together, go to school together and train at the same place, so when I train I don’t really talk to him. That’s why some people don’t even know we’re a couple haha.

Picture: RibeiroPhoto

Don’t get me wrong – I get so much advice and details on techniques from him. He helps me a lot! It’s just most of the time, we drill and spar with people our own size.

“Rolling between us is like marmite – I either hate it or love it.” – S

I genuinely feel it’s a lose-lose situation for him(being the more technical and heavier). When he rolls normally with me I feel like he is trying to smash me. But if he goes light I feel like he takes pity on me!

Picture: RibeiroPhoto

“I can’t!” – S

It’s the only time we snap at each other and we argue non-stop, haha.

“We can take things way too personal.” – R

Or maybe just me. There’s good rolls and bad rolls. The good rolls are when we’re both being technical, and not giving a 100%. Rolls get bad when the intensity is turned up (usually by me haha). That’s why I think it’s easier to flow-roll with him.

Picture: RibeiroPhoto

“90% of the time it’s no problem (but it can get heated).” – E

I spar with my boyfriend as much as I can. We can make it a good roll despite the size difference, because we both have a lot of experience. On the other side, I have my feelings on the outside when we train, so he that means sees me at my best and worst..

“Last time we trained, I broke his nose.” – E.

But we train together, still haha. There’s a size difference, so we don’t do that many rounds together. But I love to train with him!

“I love training with my husband, but not every day.” – H

My husband is a judo black belt and has slowly come to enjoy jiu jitsu after I started. He is 17kg heavier than me, so I just try to survive, but we have fun!

“I believe it’s important to treat your partner as any other training partner at the gym.” – C

Leave the relationship at the door and you will be able to have lots of fun.

“He’s my hardest but my safest training.” – R 

It’s made us closer, respect each other more and honest There’s no one who pushes me more than him. He knows my limits, how to push me and how much I can handle from him.

Sometimes it sucks! But I really believe it’s helped our marriage a lot off the mat. It’s been a metaphor for our life together!

*All quotes and answers are derived from anonymous replies! The photos in this article therefore do not directly correspond to the quotes.



Rose is a black belt at Brazilian Jiu Jitsu Academy Amsterdam (Checkmat). Besides being one of the co-founders of Ladies Only BJJ, she is a junior doctor MD and holds a MsC degree in Sports Sciences.